"It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
"Home is not where you live, but where they understand you." - Christion Morgenstern
"There are some things you can't share without ending up liking each other, and knocking out a twelve-foot mountain troll is one of them." -J.K. Rowling

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Monday, November 28, 2011

Well, It Has Fulfilled It's Purpose. . .

"Moments like these just can't be forgotten."
I'm writing this post because I miss my family. We haven't had any adventures lately - actually, we've BARELY seen each other lately. I don't know about you guys, but I'm going through some serious withdrawals. I've missed our times together so much that all I could think to do was go back to post one (which is where my quote at the top came from) and read about all of our good times to hold me over until this upcoming Thursday - our family Temple Square night.
I found myself laughing out loud in surprise as I read about things that I - regrettably - had forgotten. My heart literally smiled while I relived our schemes and good times, and I think I'm even more excited for Thursday than I was when we first planned it. I love you guys!
Moments Like These

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Man Points

Katie was withholding the man points list, but Tanner and I used our manly cunning to snatch it from her car.

On the last day of our Summer cabin trip, Paige and Katie decided to see who was more manly; me, or Tanner.
These were the results.

We each started out with one hundred points.

Start: 100
Bacon: 50
Burning hand: 5
Feet off floor: -20
Boredom: 5
Noticing girl hair: 10
Seductive grape: 50
Condescending glare: 10
Tongues: 20
Dirty water: 25
ADD: 20
Blow dry face: 15
Aggression towards Paige: -25
Kneeling to Paige: 10
Cleaning up: 20
Glade scented candle: -10
Stutter: 10
Entertainment: 10
Kitchen affection: -25
Singing: 10
Admitting he doesn't like a burger joint: 10
Being "awesome": 10
Not helping Beverly Hills (Cassidy): -10
Constantly checking list: -10
Wandering confusedly: 15
Not showering for ride home: 20
Not complaining: 10
Changing clothes: 10
Not shaving: 10
Not listening to female counterpart (Paige) : -10
New page: 10
Packing up: 15
Man hair: 10
Full facial hair: 25

Grand total: 435


Start: 100
No girls: 10
Complaining: -10
Breakfast: 25
Sitting like a man: 25
Chewing dead pig: 10
Hair comment: -25
Cocky: 50
Looking lost: 50
Thinking: -10
Argumentative: -5
Complaining: -10
Cigar comment: 60
Man laugh: 10
ADD: 20
Mario pants: 10
Bring up wrestling: 10
Cleaning up: 20
Maroon 5 favorite band: 5
Complained: -10
Death threat: 15
Kitchen affection: -25
Singing: 10
Kitchen affection refusal: -25
Admitting he didn't like a burger joint: 10
Confidence in manhood: 10
Checking the list: -10
Smelling amazing: 25
"I love you": 10
Cunning: 5
Little boyish demeanor: 5
Knowing how to spell: 5
New page: 10
Packing up: 15
Man hair: 10
Singing/dancing: 20
Not shaving: 10

Grand total: 465

I won. Because obviously I am more manly than Tanner. As if that wasn't already shockingly apparent.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Family Game Night

Whilst writing the last post, I had the most excellent idea. As a Family, we needed to have a night that was just for us - especially with everything going on in our lives. Today marks the first of many weekly gatherings that are yet to come.
We all - minus Tanner: he had to take his family that he lives with to the zoo - gathered at my house to partake in my - if I could say so myself - DELICIOUS home-made pizza and relax. Relaxing was the last thing on Katie's mind, however, because we decided to play Super Mario Bro.s on the Wii. Katie's past disagreements with video games will not be documented more than stating that they have happened, and they only continued tonight. Needless to say, Ryan and I spent much time collecting coins so that Katie could recieve a 1-up and join us for a few more seconds. Tanner ended up being able to join in at the end - we all sat around my downstairs kitchen table and just talked and abused each other - a little verbally, a little physically. There aren't many things I can post directly from tonight because it all just kind of ran together and built on itself like a big huge snowball that could take out an entire hamlet, but there was much laughing, many screams, smiles, and a couple of infuriated outbursts. It's just nice to know that life will keep moving on, but some things never change.
Moments Like These

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Well, It's Been A While. . .

Dearest Readers, I regret to inform you that we - which, lets face it, really means mostly just me - have been slacking on updating you guys with all of the zany adventures of our lives. Since my last post, we've gone on our first vacation as a family, we've started new jobs, and school has even started - for all of us. Our lives are just as crazy as they used to be, it's just in a different way. I'm going to try to recap everything so that I don't lose track of it all, and hopefully start a new habit of actually posting things when they happen. . . maybe.
The cabin trip was pretty much the best thing of my life. The only thing that would be better would be the four of us in Disneyland - and the only thing better than that would be the four of us in the Wizarding World of Harry Potter, and that's just because that place was already my heaven on earth. We drove up there with Cass - The Accepted - and left all of our worries behind. I don't know about the others, but it was SO great to relax and forget about work, studies - not that those have ever stressed ME out in particular, and the hullabaloo that is life. We took an air mattress and inner tubes so that we could float down the river that runs through the front yard. Ryan had a . . . well, disagreement with the water, as he and I floated down in the tubes and Katie and Tanner upheld the old, and most noble, tradition of Redneck Fishing and took the mattress. There was a scuffle and both of them ended up more wet than either Ryan or I did and we were actually IN the water. I don't know how it happened, but then again, Katie hasn't been called the plotter for nothing.
My birthday was super fantastic! Out in the middle of nowhere with my 3 best friends, my older brother and his girl friend, and the only little sister I'll actually claim to be related to, was just perfect. Cass went all out and made me a cake, Katie got me this AWESOME pillow that had the phrase "Normal People Scare Me" - which is something sadly true about my life - Tanner got me this PHENOMENAL mug that is all black with the words "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good" on the outside. When you fill it with hot stuff - not people, liquids - it turns all white and says "Mischief Managed." I feel all awesome when I make hot chocolate now. Ryan got me this awesome jersey to symbolize our theme song - Must Have Done Something Right, by Relient K - and my cousin got me all of these random and surprisingly entertaining kink-knacks from West Yellowstone. We had a delicious dinner - Ryan's speciality, chicken and potatoes, with some of the best rolls on the planet (the second attempt was good - the first made the rolls appropriate for naughty kids on Christmas more than a nice dinner), and my family's famous salad.
At some point why we were up there, we watched 1408. It was the first time Tanner and Ryan had ever seen it - and, let me tell you, the middle of nowhere, in the pitch black hours of the pm is probably the best time and place to watch a scary movie. Tanner and Ryan were scared senseless, it was kind of hysterical.
My cousin brought up his 4 wheeler and we also spent a lot of time on that. We finally broke in our set of Killer Bunnies: The Ultimate Odyssey and Ryan was attacked by a gopher. . . and a rusty old nail.
We came back, and literally got thrown back into our lives. Katie started a new job at the Ashford clinic - compliments of Tanner - I had to battle with the Area manager of my Jimmy John's store on when and why I would wear a belt, and all four of us had the looming shadow of the upcoming school year to deal with. It'd been almost a year since I had taken part in any kind of schooling - I don't do well with people talking AT me - Ryan was starting his senior year, Tanner is sophomore year in collage, and Katie her freshman year in collage. I started Culinary school. Our responsibilities have seriously depleted our time together, but we all still seem to find the random five minutes here and there to keep it all together.
These past couple of months have been hard. We've all been used to seeing each other ALL of the time, and with everything, there are suddenly more important things in life. I guess it kind of exemplifies the horrors of growing up. I've thought though, that maybe it won't be so bad. Sure, we'll go our separate ways, relationships will weaken, things will be forgotten, but we'll always have each other to fall back on. That's the definition of family, right? I mean, we might not always know what is going on but we know each other well enough to feel comfortable falling on. I think that is the coolest thing about the moments we've had that help us to define each other as our family. Hopefully, though, there will be more adventures along the way.
Moments Like These

Sunday, September 4, 2011


Nice impatient face Tanner dearest, however, I too am impatient. Please refer to the prank war posts, notice the invasion of secret agents into your bedrooms was the final story in this saga, however, this should no be so. I will post the man points when, and only when, there is a white flag of shame fluttering from Ryan's front porch, or a retaliation has been made.
To ensure this, I have hidden the Man Points in some unknown area to any person other than myself, you breaking into my room to find the paper will be a vain attempt.
Retaliation or flag. Your choice love :)

Warm regards and much love,
Adventure (If I were still the Plotter I would have a plotting smile on my face.)

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Dear Katie

This is my impatient face:


I'm getting impatient.

ME! <----- (I hear that guy's pretty awesome!)

Friday, August 5, 2011

Dear Katie

Dear Katie,

As you are aware, all of us (meaning ALL of us) are (im)patiently waiting for the Man Points count from the cabin to be put on the blog. Get to it!!!


Saturday, July 16, 2011

Cabin Packing List! :)

·         Full Killer Bunnies (Odyssey included)
·         Perpetual Commotion
·         Redneck supplies
o   Air Mattress
o   Sunscreen
o   Bug spray
·         Costco Cinnamon rolls
·         Costco muffins
·         Eggs
·         Bacon
·         Buttermilk biscuits
·         Bread
·         Cinnamon
·         Milk
·         Orange Juice
·         Lunchmeat
·         Bread
·         Sandwich stuff
·         Ryan’s favorite Mac n’ Cheese
·         Rolls
·         Red potatoes
·         Lipton soup mix
·         Frozen chicken
·         BBQ sauce (safe for Katie)
·         Yummy salad
·         Parmesan Cheese
·         Lemon pepper
·         Garlicky
·         Lemon Juice
·         Tinfoil
·         Frozen Pizza (CPK)
·         Wheat Thins
·         Lays chips
·         Grapes
·         Fruit snacks
·         Gushy Gummy Bears
·         Kashi chocolate chip cookies
·         S’mores stuff
o   Heresy’s
o   Flat Marshmallows (Jewish style)
o   Starbursts
o   Gram Crackers
·         Paige demands Rootbeer (A&W)
·         Water Bottles
·         Fuze
·         Diet Coke
·         Spring water jugs
·         1 nice water bottle (nifty non-screw off lid)
·         Good shoes that can be ruined
·         Swimsuit
·         T-shirts
·         Face wash
·         10-20$ cash
·         Books
·         Camera
·         Movies
·         IPods
·         Towels
·         Pillows/blankets
·         Cell phones/Chargers
·         Toothbrush/toothpaste
·         Astringent
·         Sunglasses
 ·        First aid Kit
  3 CDs for the car
1.      No texting/calling (biological family okay)
2.      No Computers other than for movies, writing, and Pottermore
3.      No killing each other
4.      No Ke$ha
5.      No Rap
6.      No Country Tim McGraw style
7.      No personal space (within reason)
8.      Pictures MUST be taken for Moments

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

In response to 'Summer' posted by the Energy

As the Peace, I would like to point out that it probably wouldn't kill any of you guys to post things every now and then. I only have so much time to chronicle our adventures - but they're not just mine.
Just sayin :D

Well, We're Not Really Sure What He's Talkin' About

So, this was the first Saturday of Katie's Seattle trip - obviously she'll be absent from this story. But never fear, dear readers, we get to introduce a new character into our story today. In all honesty, she should have entered a long time ago - she's just never been a part of, as they say, 'blog-worthy' events.
Ryan found out about a Forever The Sickest Kids concert for free at the Fashion Place Mall from his friend, Mandi, that he hadn't seen in AGES. She was going to be there, and wanted him to come so they could actually SEE each other. Ryan didn't want to go up all alone, so Tanner and I got invited. My parents had taken one of my three little sisters to Orlando - the rest of us went a while ago. . .The Wizarding World of Harry Potter is AMAZING, by the way.) - and the youngest - mentioned previously on this blog as TTB - was at Lagoon with her friends, so Cassidy - The Accepted - got to come with me. It was to be her first concert ever. . .
Anyway, we'd planned to meet at Ryan's house, go to Barnes & Noble, and end up at the mall in time for Forever The Sickest Kids to go on. When Cass and I got to Ryan's house, we ended up watching him play Twilight Princess for a while - entertaining I know, but you have to give us a little credit, our Adventure was in a completely different state, we're lucky we had plans at all.
Now it may be my fault, as practically the only record keeper of this family, but I can't really remember when Tanner joined the story. I just know he was in my car when we left Ryan's house for Barnes & Nobel. We spent a lot of time there, seeing as it's mine and Ryan's favorite place on earth. I bought one of the Scott Pilgirm series, Fahrenheit 451, and Name of the Wind. Tanner bought himself another copy of The Road. Ryan bought some poetry books. . . I think.
Once we were done there, we left to Fashion Place. When we got there, we realized that the other band playing was still going, and Ryan didn't want to force his way through the mosh pit to find Mandi, so we decided to give in to Cassidy's pleadings and go peruse the mall. We looked into practically every store - I pointed out all of the lovely light fixtures - and got food from Pretzel Time. We meandered back out to the concert to find this black hippie guy on stage.
When I say hippie, I MEAN hippie. He had these huge black shades on, his hair was all up in dreadlocks and he was up on stage preaching about peace and love. Ryan started texting Mandi, telling her to come find us. Tanner and I finally got to meet the amazing Mandi, and then Forever the Sickest Kids came on. Now, I'm not a huge fan of these guys. I think they're great and all, but I only know TWO, count 'em TWO, of their songs. So when Ryan and Mandi ended up joining the mosh pit, Tanner, Cass, and I hung back. Cass more because I didn't want to let her out of my sight. It was a wonderful concert! The music rocked and about half way through, Cass got anxious so I sent her up with Ryan and she moshed with him and Mandi. Tanner and I just kind of chilled in the back.
The band finished their set list and walked off the stage, got an encore, came back, played another song and then left, so the black hippie returned. He came on stage and started preaching again, it went something like this:
"We have such a beautiful earth. We are so lucky and we need to treat it and all of God's creations right. Whenever you go to leave the water on, turn it off. When ever you go to leave the lights on, turn them off. When ever you go to litter, don't. Just think of all those poor animals - all the possums with their heads caught in the plastic, all the scorpions with their heads stuck in the plastic. If you love your earth show me your hearts."
This was not some kind of cannibalistic ritual, I promise. Geez, I wouldn't take my 14 year old sister to one of those! The whole crowd - Tanner and I, included - put their hands together to make hearts and put them in the air. At this point a techno beat started banging through the speakers, and the hippie continued.
"Now, bounce with your heart, bounce with your heart. If you love your planet, just bounce with j'heart, bounce with j'heart. . . " so on and so forth.
It was quite hysterical, and I think Cass was a little confused. We parted ways with Mandi, and ended back at my house relaxing in my theatre room. If that doesn't sound like a nice full day, I don't know what is.

Moments Like These

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

To "The Energy"

Now we have got that out of the way. . .
Dear Energy and everyone else for that matter,
I apologize (please don't strike me down any of you!) for not having any adventures for this summer so far. However, I have much planned for our summer vacation at the cabin, and in my own defense, this summer would be more full of randomness and excitement if it weren't for all of the time at work/vacationing. So it isn't my fault we haven't had much going on. The end of July will be sure to generate something! Before you know it we'll be back to our usual pace. :)

Much love,

Monday, July 4, 2011


I'm going to copy Ryan on this... "Also, this blog is boring."

We need more summer adventures, we haven't done much lately.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

There's 104 Days of Summer Vacation. . .

Well, we finally got to our family summer kick off! In the tradition of all of our best adventures, it was almost completely spur of the moment.
There is this AWESOME river that is extremely close to my house. It pulls through a randomly forested patch of land in the Alpinian suburbs, complete with random derelict tree houses and winding dirt trails. At one of the curves in the river the trail goes the other way leaving a tear shaped peninsula type thing at the bank of the river - the perfect place to relax, take in the beautiful scenery, and let the sound of the rushing water cascade over you as the sun beats down and warms your skin. That's only during the day though.
We decided to go at night. SO much better in my opinion - but that might be my heat sensitivity and nocturnal tendencies kicking in. Anyway, Ryan and I had to work at our second job at Jimmy Johns until about 10 o'clock - once we were off we stopped by his house so he could change and we could meet with Tanner and Katie and then we headed towards the trail head. I'd already packed a blanket, almost a million little candles, a lighter, and Kiwi - my laptop - so we gathered our supplies and headed down to the peninsula. You're all probably wondering why I brought my laptop - I'm writing a book, which STILL has no title, that is all about spirits called elementals. They are made up of, live in, and can control all four elements. This tear drop peninsula is the PERFECT place to sit and write - especially for my elemental story, but really for anyone trying to write anything. I was going to write while they all laid around and talked.
That probably sounds odd to ya'll, I mean, kind of lame for an epic summer kick off right? WRONG. The way I see it, summer is about kicking back and relaxing, *cough. . .KATIE. . .cough* so what better way to start it than relaxing with each of our three favortie people in the entire world.
Besides, we've got style.
Once we got there, I laid out the blanket and opened my laptop while the other three started lighting candles. Once they had a good ammount (a.k.a. all of the candles were lit), they spent a good five to ten minutes arranging them around the edge of our peninsula. According to Ryan, 'They create a shield, so that we can be safe here this late at night. When they burn out the smoke continues in the other demensions and the barrier stays - so long as the candles were actually lit.'
We're all a little weird, okay?

Moments Like These

Friday, June 17, 2011

A Tribute

Doug, even the name is simple, but then again - so was he. He was a friend, something to smile about, and something you could always count on his schedule was always open for a friend - even if he had to push a "shirt" conference aside.
From his perfect pallor to his signature scarf, Doug was always suave! His life may have been short, but that does not mean he will be short lived in our memory. From the moment he joined us there was only smiles and laughter - the day he left us was filled with great sadness.
He will be survived by the three lonely tacks, which now only holds his scarf that will forever only hang limp with nothing to warm.
The six months we were allotted with him, taught us the value of life in all forms. Doug, if you read this, you're missed. The day you disappeared changed us - no note, no reason, not even a drop of water or shred of yellow to say good-bye. Come home - but if it is too late we will forever hold you high in our memories - heart.
Obituary written by: Katie Smith

Moments Like These

Saturday, June 11, 2011

I'd Never Guess How We Ever Could Have Got Here

The beginning of this summer marks a whole YEAR of being a family. I didn't even realize until we were driving Ryan home, just like the good old days, and he said, "Remember a year ago today, when you got me home in four minutes so that I could make curfew?"
I laughed and replied, "Well, that was when we had to make a good impression on your family." (For the record, we have yet to have Ryan home late - us LEAVING on time is another story.)
Anyway, it got me thinking. SO much has changed in the last year. Seriously. The very foundations on which I stand have shifted so much that I don't even know where to begin. This family has been as solid as a rock all the way through it.
This blog is a tribute to our times together, our family history, if you will. Since it's a new year, we've got to revamp things. You'll notice our new layout, the updated quotes, and the new lists on the side bars. We've also got new titles. They need a little bit of an explanation though. Every family, no matter how dysfunctional, is a group of people that exist to fulfill each other's needs. Every one of us has a different role, every one of us fulfills a different purpose. The newest titles are the purposes we fill.
I am the Peace - this one will be shorter because I don't like writing about myself. I've been told that I give good advice. When problems arise, I'm always asked for my advice. It seems to help and calm people down - hence the peace.
Tanner is the Energy - out of all of us, Tanner is the one that just keeps going. He has this energy that rubs off on all of us. When we're all tired Tanner is the one to get us all up and going. He's our own personal Energizer Bunny.
Katie is the Adventure - no matter where we are or who we're with Katie has the oddest ability to infuse us all with the desire to do something crazy. As you all know, she is the mastermind behind pretty much all of our harebrained adventures. Even in the ones she wasn't behind, she's always the little voice calling 'ONWARD!!' or egging us on 'Do it, do it, do it!' This blog, and our lives would be HEINOUSLY boring without her.
Ryan is our Sanity - though he may be a little unbalanced himself, Ryan has the kind of personality that just reaches out to people. Even if our problems are unsolvable, he has a way of calming us all down and making everything a little more bearable with his knack of snapping things in to perspective. Our heads are all little clearer than they would be without his influence in our lives.

Here's to a new year, and a whole summers worth of amazing adventures.

Moments Like These

Sunday, May 29, 2011

The Great Prank War, Men's Turn (Round 1)

So... almost two months ago Ryan and I pulled our prank on the girls.  I know it's been a really long time since then, making this post well over-due, but it's finally here!  (But short....)

So, planning for this prank took a while.  Ryan and I have had our plans for a few months before we found the perfect time to execute our plan.  Our plan was to stuff Katie's and Paige's car with packing peanuts and newspaper.  This had to be done at night when the girls were both asleep.  It also had to be done when we wouldn't cause the girls to be late for anything the next morning.  What better time to do this than LDS General Conference weekend?

So, first thing's first, we needed a way to get into the girl's locked cars.  Ryan came up with the idea to make copies of their keys and use those.  So one day Ryan took Paige out shopping with him while I snuck into his house, stole Paige's keys from there, drove to Lowes, copied the key and drove back to Ryan's house before he and Paige got back.  It worked.  Then a few days later I snatched one of Katie's spare keys from her room.

Win.  After we had their keys in our possession, we just needed to buy the supplies next.  So Ryan and I went out on the Wednesday before we were going to prank the girls and bought one GIANT bag of packing peanuts, wax pineapples, ribbon, chocolate-scented candles, magnetic alarms, and some other supplies to randomly put in their cars.

Then we went to Ryan's house to store everything.  Then I brought in a big pile of newspapers to mix in with the packing peanuts, and we spent almost an hour crumpling up all of the newspaper.

 (Our hands were black afterwards)

So we had everything planned, bought, stored, and prepared for our visit to the girls' houses on Saturday night/Sunday morning.  When we finally got to stuffing the girls' cars, they ended up looking something like this:

Saturday, May 28, 2011

The Great Prank War, Round Two (Girls): The Adventure of the Double Agent S's

So. . .sometime in the near future, the guys MIGHT finish their side of Round One, and post their story, but I'm impatient and can't wait for that, so they can suffer the consequences and you can enjoy the Adventures of the Double Agent S's.
It was a dark and stormy . . . well, morning, and Elmo's giggles didn't help with the picutre much, did they Ryan? I'd been sleeping withe the demonic doll in my closet for about a week, but Kaite and I were finally ready. For those of you that follow, and ever wish to replicate this prank/excelent dance asking idea, here is what you need:
Proper attire: This might just be a me and Katie thing, but it definitely makes it more fun. We wore all black, naturally. What kind of spies wouldn't?

  1. Red yarn: Effective, and not-deadly lasers. You don't want to lose any limbs.

  2. A shoe box: Case for the bomb

  3. Jack-in-the-Box: the bomb. It works best if you find one that's creepy, like a clown or an Elmo, for instance.

  4. Painter's tape: holds the yarn up pretty effectively actually.

  5. iPod and iHome: for the continuous loop of awesome spy music.

We planned to strike today, May 17th, because, miracle of miracles, Tanner was working and Ryan had school, neither Katie or I worked - which is more astounding for me, but hey. I set my alarm for ten thirty so that we could strike at eleven, but thankfully I slept through my alarm. You'll understand why it was a good thing in a minute.
After many apologies to Katie, our final preperations, and dressing like spies, we were off. I was literally about to turn the lights off in my room when Katie gasped.
"Ryan is calling me," she said.
"He's supposed to be in school!" I cried as she answered the phone.
I just heard random muttering on the other side.
"Oh, I'm just with Paige at her house," she said.
I guessed at what he'd said and started frantically shaking my head.
"Um. . . just a sec, Ry, let me call you back," Katie said and hung up the phone.
"WHY ISN'T HE AT SCHOOL?!" we screamed simultaneously.
"He wants to hang out," Katie said.
"Well we can't, we've got to be IN HIS ROOM," I reminded her.
"But we can't just let him go home, because we can't get into his rom if HE'S THERE," Katie said.
"Okay, call him back," I said. "But we've got to come up with a story to get us, and him, out of here, and HIM back to school."
"Don't worry," she said. "I've got to go dress shopping, remember?"
"You and your dresses," I said shaking my head as she redialed Ryan's number.
"Hey, you should just come to her house," she said once he answered the phone.
Ryan answered and Katie's eyes got wide, "Okay, we'll just be in her room, the front door is unlocked."
She snapped the phone shut and looked at me, "He'll be here in two minutes."
I looked myself up and down, taking in my tri-city spy outfit, and I suddenly understood why her eyes had gotten all wide. One look at each other, and we were BOOKING it down the stairs, stripping off our benighted clothing and throwing our 'normal people' clothes on, so that Ryan wouldn't suspect our plans. I opened up my new computer, Kiwi, and began working on a much more subtle part of the prank: the continuous loop of the Mission Impossible Theme. My only issue was that I could NOT get the file into my iTunes. So I was still working on it as Ryan walked in.
"Hey guys," he said. "I thought you'd be at Jimmy Johns, Paige."
"Nah, not today," I said, shooting a seriously annoyed glance at Katie.
She laughed.
"What're you doing?"
"Just trying to get this mp3 file on my iTunes," I said.
"Trying to decide which dress I want," Katie said.
"Oooh, which ones are you looking at?" Ryan asked, sitting on my bed next to her and adjusting her computer screen so that they could both look, while I sat on the other side of the bed trying to finish the preperation for our prank.
About half an hour passed and, after hearing multiple outbursts of frustration from me, Ryan looked up.
"What're you trying to do?" he asked.
"All I want is to get this file on my iTunes, that's IT," I said.
"Here, let me try," he said, pulling Kiwi towards him and beginning to fiddle with it.
After about five minutes of unsuccessful attempts from him, I grabbed Kiwi, deciding to download a completely different file. As I pulled Kiwi away, Ryan caught a glimpse of the file's title: Mission Impossible. An outraged cry tore through hi slips.
I deleted the file, with the most innocent expression I could muster, "I don't know what you're talking about."
"You're so full of it," he said and went back to Katie's computer.
I got the song onto my iTunes and iPod, and Ryan decided that it would probably be a good idea for him to go back to school. I don't know if ya'll can tell, but I'm rolling my eyes REALLY, really high as I'm typing this. Katie and I played the part well:
"It's just lunch time, right?" we asked. "You should stay til that is over."
"No, no, I've got to go," he said, like the good little student our Ryan really is - seriously, people 4.0 throughout High School, no joke.
"Okay, we'll walk you out at least," I said making eye contact with Katie.
We all walked up the stairs and Ryan bent over to put his shoes back on.
"What are you guys doing after I'm out of school?" Ryan asked. "We should just get back together."
"I've got to get to Salt Lake, Paige is coming dress shopping with me," Kaite said, securing our plans.
"Dang, well, text me, because I've got a math text to take, and attendance school, so I might be able to do something in between that and the date I've got going tonight."
"How long will you be after school?" I asked casually.
"At least three o'clock," Ryan replied.
"Sweet, maybe we'll see you then," Kaite said, pulling him into a hug and giving me an excited expression over his shoulder.
I hugged him and he left. Katie and I lingered at the doorway until we were just out of his eye shot, and then literally blasted down the stairs, stripping our normal people clothes off, and forcing our spy uniforms over our heads. We flew back up the front stairs (because Katie and I are just cool like that), and right over to Death - Eater of Humans. We were just about to Ryan's house and I decided to jinx our day even further.
"I'm going to cry if we pull around the corner and his car is there," I said.
Katie pulled around the corner, and . . .
That's right.
Birdie - the Painted - was in his usual perch outside the Ditty household. Almost mocking us. Almost.
"WHY?!" we both cried as Katie sped past to pull around so we could stalk his house without creeping out the neighbors too much.
"What're we going to do?" Katie asked, frantic. "We're already THREE HOURS behind!!"
"I'll text Jill," I said as I pulled out my phone.
Jilly is Ryan's older sister, she was going to be home so we could break in and attack Ryan's room. Luckily, we all work together so it's not weird for me to have her number. I opened a new message to her and typed:
"So, you should get Ryan out asap."
She replied:
"He's home for lunch, I'll let you know as SOON as he leaves"
I sighed, and replied:
"Sweet, thanks JIll :D
"So, what do we do now?" I asked.
"We could go to Starbucks, my treat," Katie said.
I'm not really one to turn down free Starbucks, so I agreed and we drove to our favorite coffe shop. As we were walking in, I lost control -
"Who would have thought that turning your best friend's rooms into Secret Spy lairs would be so FREAKIN complicated?!" I asked as we walked past this group of girls. Every single one of thier eyes got wide and one followed us with her eyes as we walked over to the register.
"I know, right?" Katie replied. "The dinosaurs (see The Great Prank War, Round One (Girls): Pre-historic AIDS) were not this hard."
"The whole world, or rather, Ryan is just against us this time," I said. "It's never been this hard before."
"Yeah, our plans usually go off without a hitch!" I said, trying not to laugh as I realized that the first girl wasn't the only one watching us anymore.
Of course, though, Ryan chose that time to enter our story - yet again. I had to restart my phone because it has these random spazams where it decides that it doesn't want to get service at all. When it turned back on I got a text from Ryan from about ten minutes ago that said:
"Hey, I don't want to go back to school, we should hang out again."
It was a good thing that neither Katie or I had gotten our drinks yet because I'm pretty sure we would have thrown them.
"Tell him we're already gone!" Katie said, so I replied:
"Dang it, we're already on the freeway to Salt Lake, if you'd texted me like five minutes ago you totally could have come with us. Kate really needs to get her dress. You should just go to school." "Dang it, okay. . ." was his reply.
We got our drinks and I got another text, this time from Jill:
"He's leaving."
"SWEET, thanks :D" was my reply.
We began to head back out to Death - Eater of Humans - when a rather agravating thought hit me.
"Kate, if he can't go to either of our houses, can't be at his own house, and doesn't want to go to school, where will he go?"
"Oh crud, he'll come here," she said, eyes widening. "We've got to book it."
We ran the rest of the way to Death - Eater of Humans - and sped out of the parking lot, bird watching the entire way back to his house. To Ryan's credit, he actually did go back to school, so the anxiety was all for nothing. We pulled back up to the Ditty household and dashed up to the front door, carting all our supplies.
"Hey, Jill," I said as we ran in. "We'll be up in his room."
"Okay," she said.
We ran up and threw his door open and got to work. I taped up our Top Secret file envelope to his door. It contained a note that said:
"Mr. Ditty:
Your mission, should you choose to accept it, involves the disarming of the bomb in the center of the room before you. Because of the delicacy of this mission, you may not use any tools but your own two hands and your own store of craft and cunning. We have no way of figuring when the bomb will detonate, so we advise that you disarm it as quickly as possible. As always, should you be caught or killed, the Secretary will disavow all knowledge of your actions. You wish this message would self-destruct."
Katie positioned our creeper Elmo bomb in the center of the room with a second envelope labeled "Agent D" on top. Inside there was another note that read:
"Agent D:
Your instructions are:

  1. The bomb must not move. The enemies that planted it, docked it on a mine that will detonate if the box even shifts positions. Use extreme caution.

  2. Once you've broken through to the inner mechanism of the bomb, be sure the explosive device doesn't move. If it does, you may have to figure out the rest on your own.

  3. There should be an easier way into the inner mechanism. The plans we intercepted show that there should be nothing keeping you from easily accessing the inner mechanisms.

We regret that we had to waste your prestigious skills on a mission as simple as this, but our bomb squads are occupied deflecting a Pagan attack on the White House.
Best of luck to you,
The Double Agent S's
I pulled my iPod out of my back pocket and selected our Top Secret playlist which consisted of only one song that was on a continuous repeat - The Mission Impossible Theme. Once we were all set up we began setting up the laser security system. This was actually a lot easier than we thought it would be. It actually made the both of us feel super awesome. Especially since, being the nerds we are, we pretended that once the yarn was taped it actually was a high-intensity laser that could chop our limbs off. The awesome spy music in the background helped a lot too.
We got out of Ryan's room pretty quickly - thank heaven, because we had to make our appointment at Tanner's house. We were suprised that we actually got there early, because not only were we three hours behind (thank you, Ryan) but we'd also had to take a break and pick Zoey - Kate's little sister - up. We'd decided that we would send the tell-tale text of 'The deed is done' at three o'clock, because Ryan would get it before he got home from attendance school/math test, and Tanner wouldn't be able to do anything about it either way because he had to be at work until five. How well do ya'll think that went over though?
Katie got a call from Ryan as we were heading to Tanner's house. Apparently, he decided to screw with our plans YET AGAIN and come home before three. We were in trouble for not following the rules - we argued that he should be in trouble for not following his freakin schedule. In the end we decided that we would colaberate at Ryan's house after his date and figure out the kinks in our rules. (For the record - because I'm SURE we'll need it - the collaberation never happened, but we did agree that rule #9 means that there must be a documentation on THIS blog - as in Moments Like These - and that the text is to be sent after the prank has been completely pulled.)
We actually had to wait a few minutes at Tanner's house before his mom was home to let us in. We may have been the tri-city spies, but there was NO way we were breaking into his house. Tanner's room is much larger than Ryan's so it was much more time consuming. Luckily we had our system from doing Ryan's so it still went pretty quickly.
The Double Agent S's have made their mark.
We HIGHLY doubt you'll be able to top that :D

Moments Like These